THIS IS HOW I CARVE A TURKEY!
My dream begins while I'm at work at Shaw's. So I'm in the back room doin my normal work stuff and I
look at the trailer and see a dragon trying to come in through the crack between the trailer and the wall. Were not talkin
about no puff the majic dragon here either, this is some Reign of Fire type deal. So now its my job to get everybody out of
the back room and onto the sales floor, but by the time that happens he's already inside. So myself and about a thousand scared
shoppers run out of the place and the nearest building I enter is the Providence State House (don't ask how it got there).
So I'm walkin around the state house and all of the sudden here comes Buddy Cianci himself running down the hall with Haley
Joel-Osment (the Sixth Sense and A.I. kid).
Buddy's yellin at me to get outta here cuz of the dragon but I tell him "Buddy, lemmy use youre phone, I gotta check
on my boy Jordan". He says no but i slip into an empty office and use the phone. I call gags' cell phone, but as everybody
knows I get : What's up everyone this Jordan...umm I'm not at my phone right now so leave a message and I'll call ya back.........bye.
As soon as the message is done Buddy and Haley kick in the door. "COME ON, we gotta get the Haley outta here!", Buddy yells.
So were off, me, Buddy Cianci, and Haley Joel-Osment. We come to a big halway near the main doors. We're standing at these
massive doors looking out the crack to see if theres any sign of the dragon" Buddy turns to Haley and says "Ok now when I
give my signal you make a break for Route 95" Just as he says this the doors appear to start to open. Turns out it wasnt doors
at all but the giant wings of the dragon. So Haley makes a break for it. I head back for the hallway, and lucky me, the dragon
follows. I sprint down the hall and see the cafeteria, but the steel cage, like the ones they use to close at the mall, is
down except for a tiny crack that I roll under.
And here comes the dragon, and right as he's about to burn me to a firey crisp, just like a movie the camera zooms
in on the face of a very serious, very pissed Buddy A. Cianci holding a shotgun who says with a vengence:
"This is
how I carve a turkey." And blam, the gun goes off, the dragon explodes (dont ask how) and the day is saved.
The End.
